20 minute shampoo? Yes, please!

The last time I attempted getting my hair done in Asia, was when I was living in Shanghai in October 2003.  My hair was a mess, and I needed serious color and a cut.  My roommates and I went to a very expensive salon, and expected, well, a fairly good outcome.  My roommates did ok.  I, however, ended up coming out looking like a banana- the skin of a banana.  At first, they tried to give me highlights, but somehow they bleached me in such big chunks and so badly, that when they combed my hair out afterward, it literally looked STRIPED (horizontally, not vertically!).  And the color was awful.  The only answer was to simply bleach it all- which is what they did.  But somehow it still ended up yellow, instead of, say, blond.  It was AWFUL.  I wish I had a picture... I just spent a few minutes scouring my files, but I don't have one.  The next time I had my hair done was back in the States at Christmas 2003, and although they did their best, for some reason, after whatever they did, when I went back to China, my hair turned orange in parts!  I did find a picture of that... you can notice the orange along the side of my forehead on the left of the picture, and at my ends on both sides of my hair.  It was weird. 

Eventually I got all that orange cut off, or colored out, and I spent a few more years very blond- until I had a baby.  Well, actually, I went darker before that, but when Beni was 6 mos old, I decided I was done with coloring my hair for the meantime.  It's just not maintenance I want to deal with!  

So fast forward, because I'm getting lost in the point of my story... oh yes.  So here I am, now, in Laos, and it had been about 6 mos since my last haircut.  Now, I pretty much get a bob of some sort every time I cut my hair, so, letting it grow out for 6 mos doesn't necessarily look horrible.  But my hair is very thin, and the longer it gets the more useless it is.  So, I was dying for a haircut.  It was just driving me crazy! 

So I asked my SIL for a recommendation on where to go, and I booked an appointment, hoping for the best!

Now, when I was living in Shanghai, I remember people always saying that they would go get their hair washed and dried just for the massage.  I don't recall getting any massage at that expensive salon in Shanghai, and since I never dared set foot in another salon while I lived there, I never experienced this.  

Well, today, I had a 20 minute shampoo.  I got to lay down on this almost fully reclined chair- like a leather office chair, except, it's reclined, and has a foot rest- and rest my head on a slightly slanted back headrest, while the shampooer soaped me up twice, massaged with the shampoo in my hair for a good 10-15 minutes, and then did a conditioner as well, and massaged a while longer.  I love head massages, and she got my neck too, so it was WONDERFUL.  

After that, I went and sat in the chair, and the stylist asked what I wanted.  I said, about chin length, a bit longer in front than in back, and slightly layered, just to add some oomph.  And this is what I got: 

  Chin length, slightly longer in front than back, a slightly layered around the bottom for oomph! 

Of course, I didn't have any color done, and I am happy with that- I'm enjoying the ease of being natural in that sense these days, not having to worry about roots and whatnot.  Skipping the color definitely took a lot of the fear out of this experience.  But, I tend to be a weenie about my hair.  It's very thin and not that impressive, so I like to keep things simple and easy.  I'm NOT a do my hair every day kind of person, and I need a haircut that looks good without having to be "done".  So, I'm always a little anxious going into a haircut, especially with a new stylist, and even more so when language might be an issue.  But alas, it wasn't.  

And the best part?   It only cost me $15!  

So I'm thinking, I won't be shy about going to get my hair cut anymore here!  Between the head massage and how well she cut it... I'm in! :)

Have you ever had a haircut or color nightmare?     

The things we're missing out on...

OK, yes, I have pictures to share of our trip to Vang Vieng, but, I have been extremely lazy about getting down to business and writing that post!  Sorry!  I will do it soon!

But for now, I'm moved to write about something else.  There is something that comes over me nearly every autumn.  It has a lot to do with facebook.  I see pictures of my friends and their kids at pumpkin patches, dressed up for Halloween, carving pumpkins, outside with rosy cheeks running around in piles of leaves... I'm not going to lie, it makes me nostalgic, and it makes me miss home.

And now that Beni is here, it makes me wonder what we're missing out on by not being there.

Growing up in Michigan, as I did, means life revolves around the seasons because it can't not.  Maybe not quite to the extent that it did 100 years ago, because heating and housing and cars make a big difference, but....when it's summer and hot and the land is producing juicy fruits, and the water is warm you go swimming and you indulge in fresh food straight from the garden (or farmer's market)- you make the most of it, because you know it won't last.  Autumn comes and you enjoy the changing leaves, the pumpkins and apples, going for walks wearing a sweatshirt and a scarf around your neck.  Winter arrives, and it's time to play in the snow... whether sledding, or skiing or building a snowman- and enjoying thawing out when you come inside with a cup of hot chocolate.  And when spring finally arrives (after what seems like a lifetime of freezing temps) you watch nature come back to life- flowers bloom, trees bud and eventually sprout leaves, the grass turns lush and green again, you head outside for walks, maybe carrying an umbrella just in case, waiting for the day you can plant your garden, or when the farmer's market finally opens again.  When the seasons change so drastically, you can't ignore them.  And you can't not make the most of every season, because you know they only last so long.

Now, don't get me wrong- I could stand a place that had a proper winter with snow and all, but I would like it much better if it only last like 2 months- December and January- plenty for me! Alas, I don't know of any places that have a true winter which is that short.  Ah well. Until now, avoiding winter has been reason enough for me to choose warm places to live, even if it means no real seasons.  And even if it means missing out on traditions, and enjoying the special things that come with each season.

But kids change everything, don't they?  I'm sad now that Beni is missing out on pumpkin patches and hay rides, carving pumpkins, and maybe even Halloween (haven't been a big fan of Halloween since I was a kid myself- but Beni would be really cute dressed up, wouldn't she?).

I've seen some people try to recreate these traditions while living abroad- but sometimes it just doesn't work out.  I mean, Halloween in one compound with a handful of kids and a handful of houses to go to is ok.... but not the same as wandering a neighborhood all night surrounded by hundreds of other kids running around in costumes dragging pillow cases full of candy with them.  We could potentially pick up some pumpkins here, although I haven't seen any big orange ones (they are kind of squat and greenish), and we could even carve it- but it's just not quite the same when we'd be the only house as far as we know that had a pumpkin on the front stoop.  What's missing is the sense of community.... the chill in the air... the turning leaves... the hot apple cider and warm donuts!

That said, I have organized a couple very successful Thanksgivings while living abroad.  But, that is because Thanksgiving (the modern version of it) is the best holiday- it only takes being surrounded by people you love and care for, and some good food.  It helps if you can get your hands on some of the traditional ones- and in most places finding meat and potatoes isn't that hard.

It's October 24th today (Beni's 18 mos birthday, by the way!), and we spent the afternoon in the pool.  We had to wait until afternoon because midday was TOO HOT to be outside.  So thoughts of pumpkins and hot apple cider are far from my mind (until I see those darn pictures on facebook!).

Now I realize, one might argue, that even though Beni is missing out on such traditions from back home, she's gaining a lot of other knowledge and experience where she is.  I can't deny that, but I also don't think it's quite the same.  Sure, she's going to have a completely different perspective on the world someday if she remembers all of this- but, I don't know, there is no personal connection to any of it here.  We have no investment in Lao or its culture and tradition.  Even if we do embrace and join in while we're here (which I can't say we've done)- when we leave, in all likelihood, we'll leave it all behind.  And that is probably because so much of it is so very foreign to us, based in principles we don't know or identify with.  So does that mean we're all missing out in the end after all?



What's your favorite tradition for this time of year???          

And we thought it was hard last time...

Since we arrived in Laos, we've had two main projects to handle... 1) finding a house, and 2) finding a car.  We're got #1 handled now, of course, but we are still working on #2.  And goodness gracious, is it NOT a fun process.  I mean, back when we bought a car in the States we thought that was stressful and difficult because you never know who you can trust- are the used car salesmen trying to rip you off?  Is a private seller trying to hide something? You just don't know.  And everybody has an opinion as well- you're paying too much, you're buying too quickly- but, at least we found, most people were all talk, and no one was willing to come to bat for us!  So we ended up doing what we were comfortable with, and I drove that Impala with a smile on my face for a full 7 mos and we never had any problems with it, and we sold it for just a little less than we paid for it.

Now, we have this whole buying a used car thing under our belts, but, it's way different here in Lao.  Two issues complicate the whole deal.

The first is that there are a lot of cars in Lao that are brought in by non-profit organizations.  When they bring in these cars, they don't have to pay tax on importing them.  They are hence referred to as "tax-not-paid."  These cars can be sold, BUT, you cannot transfer the title of the car until the taxes are paid- so in essence, if you bought one of these cars you'd have it, but, technically, according to the paperwork, it wouldn't be yours.  Unless of course you wanted to pay the taxes...but, from what I have been told, the taxes amount to quite a large sum of money, and the whole process is quite tedious as well.  And you can imagine, selling a car later on that technically isn't yours isn't all that easy either- which is why most people shy away from tax-not-paid cars.   This then, brings down the number of cars available to buy drastically.

The second issue is converted cars.  Apparently there is big business in bringing in cars from Japan, Thailand or somewhere else where they right hand drive (driver is on the right in the car), and then convert these cars to left hand drive.  I have no idea what this process involves (more than just moving the steering wheel apparently), but have been told that if it's done poorly, the car will be completely worthless.  If it's done well and correctly, apparently it can work just fine.  But, there is no way to know if you're getting a good one or a bad one until it's too late.   This is a major bummer because this takes another HUGE chunk of available cars off the market.  Also, it stinks because my favorite pictures of any car that Joel has showed me were of a lovely Honda, that was clean and new and spacious and just lovely, and then he said, "Oh oops...this is a converted one."  :(    

The third thing that is an issue just for us/me is that I have never driven a stick before.  Well, I did once, but only for one evening, and I was only mildly good at it.  So we'd like to get an automatic, because it would be easier for me, but, there are 9 manuals to every automatic- and it seems that a lot of the autos are the converted ones. Sigh.

So, our search continues.  And searching, by the way, means driving around town, searching for cars that have for sale signs in the back window.  When you find one, you take pictures, get the number, and then try to call about it.  We've actually met with people to check out two cars, and taken one to the mechanic.  The mechanic told us that one needed a lot of work.  So we're still searching.  And we're considering trying to negotiate the price down on the one that needs work.

For now, Joel is riding around on my SIL's motorbike, and Beni and I are getting around only courtesy of my BIL/SIL and their car.  While Joel could continue in this manner for some time, Beni and I need our own transport sooner rather than later.  So now that we're just about moved into our house, we're definitely going to focus full steam on finding a car.  Wish us luck!

Seen for sale on the street

Every Wednesday for the last few months, Beni and I get moving a bit earlier than usual to drive into town to attend a mommy and baby play group.  The drive into town is not far distance wise-not much more than 10-15km/6-9m .  However, the length of the drive can vary from an hour and 15 minutes to 2 and a half hours.  This city was not built for the amount of traffic is now has, and rush hour traffic can literally back up for miles and miles and miles and move at a snails pace for a long time. 

Luckily, this drive, while long, is rarely boring because there is so much going on just outside your car windows.  Beni would always nap during this drive, and I always looked forward to it as a quiet time to stare out the window.  I regret that I never kept an actual list, because fairly early on in my drives I started keeping a mental list of things I saw for sale on the street. 

When you're sitting in that bumper to bumper traffic three lanes wide on a two lane road, all of the spaces between cars are full of men carrying things for sale.  They just walk up and down the middle of the street, every once in a while taking a break on the side of the road, offering up their goods.  If you show interest, they run right up to your window and complete the transaction right there.  If traffic starts moving while you're in the middle of a transaction, they will run along side your car until they are done.   One thing that always makes me happy is that every time I have bought something (usually just a cold drink) the vendor always runs along, or even runs to catch up to my car WITH MY CHANGE.  In a country where the poor are as poor as they are, one might not expect this. Especially when the change is worth less than a dollar.


So I wish I had been keeping an actual list, but as it is, I didn't, so for this one post, I'm going to try to remember any and all of the things I ever saw for sale in the middle of the road. 

For sale on the street in Luanda

• cold drinks (Coke, Sprite, beer, bottled water and several kinds of canned juices- they carry them in huge plastic bags full of ice)
• Whole boxes of tissues
• small bags of popcorn- salted or sweet
• shoes- dress and casual for ladies, sport, casual and dress for men
• remote controls for every possible product that might need a remote
• batteries
• towels, blankets and sheets
• guitars
• screws, nuts and bolts
• electrical mumbo jumbo I can't even name (cords and stuff)
• extension cords
• newspapers
• phone credit cards
• mosquito nets for your bed, fly nets for food
• salt/pepper/oil and vinegar sets
• HUGE wall clocks
• toilet paper
• shirts
• sunglasses
• hat stand/coat racks
• carpets
• all manner of local fruit and veg (although to be fair, this is sold on the side of the street and you do have to pull over to buy it)
• mosquito zapping rackets
• belts
• children's toys
• blow dryers, irons, ironing boards
• cds and dvds

That's all I can think of right now... but rest assured there is more.  My husband, Joel, just added that as far as he is concerned, if you want to buy it, you can buy it on the street in Luanda.  I'm not so sure about that...but, you sure can find a whole lot of things. 


Unfortunately, the mommy and baby who lived in the city that we used to go visit on Wednesdays have now moved out of Angola, so we won't be making those weekly trips into the city again.  In fact, in the month we have left in Angola, I'm not sure how many times, if at all, I will have to venture into the city again.  If I do, however, I will be sure to keep an actual list of everything I see for sale on the street that day.