OK, yes, I have pictures to share of our trip to Vang Vieng, but, I have been extremely lazy about getting down to business and writing that post! Sorry! I will do it soon!
But for now, I'm moved to write about something else. There is something that comes over me nearly every autumn. It has a lot to do with facebook. I see pictures of my friends and their kids at pumpkin patches, dressed up for Halloween, carving pumpkins, outside with rosy cheeks running around in piles of leaves... I'm not going to lie, it makes me nostalgic, and it makes me miss home.
And now that Beni is here, it makes me wonder what we're missing out on by not being there.
Growing up in Michigan, as I did, means life revolves around the seasons because it can't not. Maybe not quite to the extent that it did 100 years ago, because heating and housing and cars make a big difference, but....when it's summer and hot and the land is producing juicy fruits, and the water is warm you go swimming and you indulge in fresh food straight from the garden (or farmer's market)- you make the most of it, because you know it won't last. Autumn comes and you enjoy the changing leaves, the pumpkins and apples, going for walks wearing a sweatshirt and a scarf around your neck. Winter arrives, and it's time to play in the snow... whether sledding, or skiing or building a snowman- and enjoying thawing out when you come inside with a cup of hot chocolate. And when spring finally arrives (after what seems like a lifetime of freezing temps) you watch nature come back to life- flowers bloom, trees bud and eventually sprout leaves, the grass turns lush and green again, you head outside for walks, maybe carrying an umbrella just in case, waiting for the day you can plant your garden, or when the farmer's market finally opens again. When the seasons change so drastically, you can't ignore them. And you can't not make the most of every season, because you know they only last so long.
Now, don't get me wrong- I could stand a place that had a proper winter with snow and all, but I would like it much better if it only last like 2 months- December and January- plenty for me! Alas, I don't know of any places that have a true winter which is that short. Ah well. Until now, avoiding winter has been reason enough for me to choose warm places to live, even if it means no real seasons. And even if it means missing out on traditions, and enjoying the special things that come with each season.
But kids change everything, don't they? I'm sad now that Beni is missing out on pumpkin patches and hay rides, carving pumpkins, and maybe even Halloween (haven't been a big fan of Halloween since I was a kid myself- but Beni would be really cute dressed up, wouldn't she?).
I've seen some people try to recreate these traditions while living abroad- but sometimes it just doesn't work out. I mean, Halloween in one compound with a handful of kids and a handful of houses to go to is ok.... but not the same as wandering a neighborhood all night surrounded by hundreds of other kids running around in costumes dragging pillow cases full of candy with them. We could potentially pick up some pumpkins here, although I haven't seen any big orange ones (they are kind of squat and greenish), and we could even carve it- but it's just not quite the same when we'd be the only house as far as we know that had a pumpkin on the front stoop. What's missing is the sense of community.... the chill in the air... the turning leaves... the hot apple cider and warm donuts!
That said, I have organized a couple very successful Thanksgivings while living abroad. But, that is because Thanksgiving (the modern version of it) is the best holiday- it only takes being surrounded by people you love and care for, and some good food. It helps if you can get your hands on some of the traditional ones- and in most places finding meat and potatoes isn't that hard.
It's October 24th today (Beni's 18 mos birthday, by the way!), and we spent the afternoon in the pool. We had to wait until afternoon because midday was TOO HOT to be outside. So thoughts of pumpkins and hot apple cider are far from my mind (until I see those darn pictures on facebook!).
Now I realize, one might argue, that even though Beni is missing out on such traditions from back home, she's gaining a lot of other knowledge and experience where she is. I can't deny that, but I also don't think it's quite the same. Sure, she's going to have a completely different perspective on the world someday if she remembers all of this- but, I don't know, there is no personal connection to any of it here. We have no investment in Lao or its culture and tradition. Even if we do embrace and join in while we're here (which I can't say we've done)- when we leave, in all likelihood, we'll leave it all behind. And that is probably because so much of it is so very foreign to us, based in principles we don't know or identify with. So does that mean we're all missing out in the end after all?
What's your favorite tradition for this time of year???
8 comments:
Dunno, Mara. Change of the seasons is one of the major highlights of living in LV - especially because I lived my first 30 years in a place where the seasons didn't really change. I know that for me the seasons changing are pleasure and pain - so much of the charm of this part of the world, and also what causes the most suffering!! I can no longer imagine enjoying Christmas in 30 degrees where the tinsel and lights compete with the bright sunlight - totally lose their meaning. Or celebrating Easter in autumn, when the pagan celebration of new life and rebirth after a long winter is completely meaningless. At the same time, I would really enjoy a longer summer, or more daylight during those long long winter months... hmmmm.
I'm on the hunt for a normal looking pumpkin too! The ones here are pale and squashed looking... But we are hosting a Halloween party for our local expat mom and babies group, so it'll be a full house of little costumed children, I guess you just have to make the best of what you've got. Carved watermelon, maybe? On another note, I would like to pass on the Stylish Blogger Award to Mamma 'Round the World, thanks for all of your wondeful parenting posts!
I find that I tend to miss home this time of the year as well. I guess the change in seasons has something to do with it, except for me my friends on Facebook are commenting on longer days, warmer weather, the spring racing carnival and the anticipation of summer.
On another note, I have done the carved watermelon, they turn out alright. Not the same as a pumpin, but still worth a go and there is a lot of yummy watermelon juice to drink once it has been carved.
Mara, here in Malaysia we are also feeling the lack of the changing seasons. I wanted to also organize a trick or treat for the kids and a trick or drink for the adults, but it just didn't happen with life taking over these last few months. I am with Mook - after living in Australia I loved the winters in Alaska, Colorado, and even Latvia. But the traditions for the kids just develop differently. We always carve a pumpkin where ever we are - we just have never gone trick or treating. Traditions are what you make them in your home. Christmas for the boys is all about piragi and piparkukas, Easter coloring eggs with onion skins, piragi and egg wars. My kids traditions will be based on some of these basics added in with the culture we are experiencing at the time. In Uzbekistan at Easter we celebrated with people who enjoyed the same traditions, but enjoyed the Spring equinox celebrating Navruz. This week we will experience Deepavali, and a few weeks ago we saw Hari Raya celebrated. I look forward to seeing how Christmas is also recognized here. I think once Beni gets to the age my boys are you will also see that the traditions you share are the ones she will expect and love. They may not be the same as if you were in the US, but you will pick the important parts and add your own family traditions too.
I don't really have a favorite tradition this time of year. But I love watching the leaves change. And one of the cool things Lane and I are doing in 2 weeks is we're heading down to Southern Indiana to do a wine trail event called Fall Haul. There are 6 wineries that are participating but they'll show you how to enjoy their wines both in regular form and using it in cooking. I'm hoping we come back with some really good wines. The colors in that part of the state should be beautiful too so I'm hoping I'll get some good fall photos too!
I couldn't imagine what it would be like living abroad and not being able to fully participate in traditional holidays we have here in the US. It has got to be hard.
I'm sure I'd really miss those kinds of things, too, if I lived abroad. However, Beni is becoming so worldly! that perspective is worth a lot more than you think and will develop who she is as a person. Growing up here in the States, you don't get what it's like to be truly starving or understand the weight of culture. Even if you don't necessarily participate, she's getting it. I don't know if I'm saying it correctly, but I think you know what I mean.
Oh, and living here in lower Alabama, we don't get snow, except like once every 15 years (and even then it may not even accumulate), so I have a nostalgia for snow every winter even though I've never truly experienced its wonder.
Mook- You know it's funny, for as much as I always hated and resisted winter all these years, the Australian Christmases I've had have just not felt right. So I'm glad I'm not alone in that. And while Latvia is very similar to Michigan concerning seasons.... I don't know... it was still so much harder for me there! Wish it hadn't been!
Liene! Thanks for the award! What does that mean??? :) Have a fun Halloween party! We got Beni dressed up last year cause I HAD to buy her this ladybug costume I found. She wore it for like maybe 30 minutes while we hung out with some friends- there was no candy or anything. :) But baby's first Halloween- too cute to pass up!
Courtney, it's funny because I was also thinking about how if we were both Australian, or simply from some other part of the world that doesn't have proper seasons I might not be missing them now... but I guess there is always something to miss!
Gita, I'm sure we'll pick traditions and stick with them more when Beni gets a bit older...but I guess I just feel like I want to start things now, to give her some deep roots in them...but, it's too easy to be lazy and skip it when she would have no idea she's missing out since no one else is doing it either! Is that just me, lazy-mom? ;)
Liene, your wine tour sounds lovely! Enjoy!
Suzanne, I think I know what you mean! I know she's getting other things out of the life we're leading right now!
Thanks for all your comments ladies! I love to read them!
But definitely start things now. I really struggled every year to motivate myself to do the Easter Egg thing, as I always felt that the boys would help me for a short period of time, and then suddenly it would be me on my own. Two years ago I tried to not do it, and the boys got really upset that they wouldn't be able to do it. Last year they insisted on inviting friends over to teach them. It was interesting to see the progress and how much they valued the tradition. The hard work paid off - we Mammas always have to work to get there, and only see the fruits of the labor later on. :-)
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